Today is day fourteen of The 16 Days Campaign to end domestic abuse and violence against women. It has been a challenge to put for all this information over the past two weeks, but I believe it has also been well worth my time and effort. We have two days left, after today, and I believe that Our Lord can work miracles in our families, if only we would be His hands and demonstrate His heart for hurting people.
Although there has been much progress since the days my abuser had me in his clutches, there is still much work to be done, if we are to prevent further domestic violence against women, children, and even men.
It reasons that if we develop, promote, and implement effective strategies, we will make a difference. Even the efforts of one bystander in the life of an abuse victim can change that life for the better.
On a personal note, my abuser made me believe that no one would be willing to help me. He convinced me I was worthless, that I would be better off dead. He made me believe that he would have me committed to a psychiatric hospital if I reached out for help. Back then, there weren’t as many victim advocacy services and crisis hotlines available, and the one outsider, a Methodist minister, who I reached out to blamed it all on me. He said that if I were being abused, then I was not performing my wifely duties. In essence, my minister blamed the abuse on me.
When I did reach out and tell a family member, after years of taking the abuse in silence, I was denied her help because she believed me to be lying and manipulating the situation. I went back to my abuser because I thought I had no other choice, no help, no one who loved me enough to care.
If I would have had just one person on my side back then, well, the past is past, and I can only live for the now.
The following includes a list of things we all can do to help turn the tide of violence in our families and in our community, and ultimately in our world. Some are simple and can be done by an individual, while others are more complicated and will require the community to participate, through governmental initiatives, social activism, and providing more services and resources for the victims of intimate partner abuse.
- Increase the safety and protection of women and children.
- Promote healthy, respectful relationships, including healthier parent-child relationships.
- Develop positive family dynamics and emotionally supportive environments.
- Foster the growth of positive interactions, based on trust and respect.
- Foster effective non-violent communication skills and conflict resolution.
- Teach children appropriate peer and dating relationship tactics, what is acceptable and not acceptable.
- Promote healing and prevention in the lives of victims so that they will not be victimized again.
- Support and volunteer in local efforts supporting this cause.
- Recognize that violence against women and children is a human rights issue.
- Show solidarity among women who have suffered past abuse or are currently in an abusive situation.
- Ensure that legal, housing, safety, medical, and mental health and other services and resources are readily available and accessible to survivors of violence and abuse.
My prayer for you today is that if someone trusts you enough to reach out to you, please, please take her hand and help her so that the cycle can end and that she will know how important she really is, to you and to God.
In His Grace,
Jennifer Joy
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